Monday, December 07, 2009

Cue "misanthropic" rant

I should start by stating that this isn't directed at friends who are in various stages of the breeding process at the moment before I go further.

But I read some interesting articles recently.

Janice Turner's Worship of children has gone too far

Nancy Gibbs' Helicopter Parents: The Backlash Against Overparenting

I'm not overly fond of children. Although recently, I realised that it was more than I am not fond of parents who allow their children to behave like complete jerks. It's not the kid's fault when they're little - they're learning about social situations still. But their parents know how to behave and shouldn't act as though they're being persecuted when people are unimpressed by little Tarquin smearing banana on a wall.

Or shouty small children in cafes.

Especially when they're screaming, "I NEED TO WEE!!!" at the top of their lungs while the parents just ignore it and keep on chatting. Parents who comment, "Oh, she's so independent already!" while watching their child running around said cafe shouting loudly should possibly be locked in a cellar. I wasn't aware that being independent was code for screaming child jerk. I presumed at the time that the child's little brother who had been smashing his fork on the table for five minutes was showing how musical he was already.

But thank you, entitlement jerk parents, for sharing that with us.

Just because you've managed to force something watermelon-sized out of your vagina doesn't mean that you're any more special than anyone else who's managed to do the same thing at any point in earth's history.

And no, people aren't annoyed because you're blessed enough to have two kids and they're just bitter about having forgotten the magical joy of childhood. They're annoyed because they're fond of their eardrums and, strangely enough, eating in peace. Who would have thought?

But we're really the selfish ones for that, because we don't understand about that special thing that is parenthood. And never will, because screaming about needing to wee at the top of your lungs is obviously part of the beauty of life. Although you do wonder how those parents would react if an adult started bashing forks on tables and running around screaming about bladder function.

Actually, I'd pay money to see that. It'd be a fascinating experiment.

Anyway. I digress.

The long and short of it is that it's surely not all that hard to ensure that your children behave in manners appropriate to their surroundings. That doesn't mean they have to sit around at all times looking like they've been given five Valium. Just that people ensure that their loinfruit learns how to act in different social and environmental settings.

*end rant*


Anonymous said...

A fascinating comment - I quite agree about some parents being the problem!
I get very tired of noisy children AND noisy parents - in the streets, in the shops, in church - in fact just everywhere.

kris said...

i think the phrase "my child is so independent" is code for "kill me now, they are out of control and i can't stop them".

Della said...

Anon - I concur!

Kris - "Please, someone bring me a taser! Now! Or at the very least, one of those child harness restraint things!" sort of thing?