Wednesday, August 30, 2006

Glitter my Heart!

Okay, it seems like a lot of the people who are dropping by my blog thanks to doing a google search are doing so in the hunt of glitter hearts, or how to make heart glitter, or something with hearts and glitter.

In the past, I would have said, "Well, obviously you've come to the wrong place..." There were no hearts, no glitter, no combinations thereof. Bereft of glitter hearts, it was probably false advertising. Yes, you'd really come to the wrong place if that was what you were after.

Or maybe not!

Suddenly I realise that this is a niche market that I should be catering to! So thus I unveil my patented "Glitter Heart" technique (which is not for the squeamish or faint-at-heart). You can imagine the appropriate flourishes and fanfares right now, 'k? Right, now let's get all Martha Stewart!

Step One: Take a number of hearts. You can get these from your local butcher or supermarket. Ensure that you don't get heart-lung sets, a la biology/science classes.
Step Two: Pour a good amount of glitter into a tray. Choose whatever colour (or combination of colours) best suits your purposes or is just your favourite!
Step Three: Pat the hearts over quickly with a paper towel, but be careful not to make them too dry.
Step Four: Roll the hearts around in the glitter tray, making sure you cover the hearts entirely with the glitter.

And there you have it! Glitter hearts in four easy-to-follow-at-home steps.

Please note: this blog entry is purely satirical.

4 comments:

Dominique said...

Would you like to see my breakfast? It is now in a little bin... I can post it... do you think it will leak?

Della said...

It wasn't that gory!

Kel said...

eeewwwww!

googlers get to me via seashell searches - if I made $1 for every time I've been hit for that . . .

Della said...

Hmm... That sort of money would be useful!

I think over the weekend I had about five or six people visit my blog in search of "hearts," "glitter hearts" or "black hearts" (or variations thereof). Could be a nice little earner!